Unless some discretion is in order.
Or because a place like this now exists.
Introducing the Canyon Ranch SpaClub at the Omni Homestead, a sprawling temple of indoor-outdoor relaxation, now open.
You know this resort. Big brick place in the Alleghenies. Great golf courses. Been around since the 1700s when Thomas Jefferson would stop by for a mineral bath. But now they’ve added a humongous 60,000-square-foot spa, with 28 rooms, showers with names like “Atlantic Storm” and an all-season outdoor pool.
So here’s what’s going to happen: you’re going to show up and play 36 holes. You’re going to say, “That hurt.” Then you’ll head here.
You’ll start in Aquavana—basically a cabin where you’ll alternate between steam rooms, rain showers and cold rooms, where you’re encouraged to rub flaked ice on yourself.
Then it’s on to stone massages, a mineral soak in a tub made from black walnut, maybe a couples treatment in a poolside cabana.
Speaking of which, you’ll want to hang out by that pool afterward. Like, all day. Because you’ll have the run of spring-fed whirlpools and a co-ed Finnish sauna.
Those Finns. Always sauna-ing.