RIP Ranking DC Hotties

The Hill Has Ended its 50 Most Beautiful People List

By Kady Ruth Ashcraft ·
Dan Thornberg / EyeEm/ Getty

The Hill, required reading for everyone who works in and around...the Hill, announced that their yearly 50 Most Beautiful list is being put to rest. The list was a legendary source of D.C. gossip, favoritism, jealousy and excitement. You may wipe your salty tears on the corners of an American flag, for our country is less great today than it was yesterday.

The 50 Most Beautiful was a list that simply told us who the hot people were who working to either better or ruin our lives. It was a peek into who we’d potentially get freaky with in the swamp. Former Hill reporter Betsy Rothstein pitched the political hot or not list in 2004 and since then it’s been a critical piece of political journalism. Originally, the list just included lobbyists, journalists, lawmakers and staffers. But to celebrate its 10th anniversary, the publication opened up the nominations to the executive branch, including cabinet members, and executive agencies. Notable people included on the list were President Barack Obama (before he was president), Cory Booker, Ivanka Trump and Melania Trump.

Judging a bunch of type As who all had exhaustive gym routines and interests in brunch and baseball was a lot more fulfilling than I ever imagined it could be. The list gave the opportunity to silently stereotype the two parties and guess which one the hottie belonged to before scrolling down for the reveal. More often than not, the flat-ironed blonde in a pencil skirt was a Republican, but sometimes you’d be surprised by a barrel-chested man with a crew cut espousing radical leftist leanings. Then there were those who were independent or chose not to disclose their affiliations. I’ll come out and say it that hesitancy to commit immediately made them less hot and I think should’ve been grounds for disqualification. Besides, which team would they even play for in the Congressional softball league? Investigate them!

The Hill’s decision to end the feature is reckless in such an unstable political climate. Why do they want to take away our frivolous listicles. Leave us some norms. Their editor-in-chief simply said  all things must come to an end. Perhaps that end was pushed closer by the mass unveiling of sexual misconduct and renewed gender equality debates this year. Yeah, it's probably that, isn't it? Okay, that's legit. 

Kady Ruth Ashcraft

Kady Ruth Ashcraft is a writer, comedian, filmmaker, and Amtrak Princess. Follow her on twitter @kadyrabbit and tweet her pictures of your pets.

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