There was a time in your life when you were content with a plastic pumpkin full of fruit-flavored candies, strands of licorice and Bit-O-Honeys.

Those were simpler times.

Far less delicious times.

Now, you’ve got the State of Halloween Candy: a selection of chili-laden dark chocolates, caramel-topped marshmallows and whiskey-and-chocolate-laced figs masquerading as pumpkins that can be sent straight to your door. Here, we’ll show you.

So get in there, choose a couple of your favorites, continue shunning raisins as the imposters they are and do your part to ensure a superior Halloween for yourself and anyone who knocks on your door.

Your trick is that you ate all the candy.