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“No One Will Top Keith Moon’s One-Legged Trouser Prank Today. No One.”

10 Things You’ll Overhear Today

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Welcome to Friday. We spent the morning reading the entire Internet for the 10 bits of news most vital to your being. Then we made a quote about each one that you might ponder, overhear or maybe even deploy over the course of the day. We call it The Cooler, and we suggest sprinkling it liberally over your daily conversation.

1. “Ain’t Laurent without Hedi Slimane.”

2. “I kind of miss the days of prank phone calls. In fact, I’m going to make one right now.”

3. “Yes, I heard his cover of ‘The Bare Necessities.’ Bill Murray makes for a very convincing Baloo.”

4. “No one will top Keith Moon’s one-legged trouser prank today. No one.”

5. “Anderson Cooper’s reaction to hearing about his mother’s lesbian schoolgirl days was priceless.”

6. “Still waiting patiently for the Airbnb of food. One of these years.”

7. “The beach is no place to be going through a goth phase. Or maybe it is...”

8. “How could that juicer possibly be worth $700?”

9. “Google’s mic drop joke was funny in theory. In practice, not so much.”

10. “The day has come for me to finally hear the new Kanye.”

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