Welcome to Thursday. We spent the morning reading the entire Internet for the 10 bits of news most vital
to your being. Then we made up a quote about each one that you might ponder, overhear or maybe even deploy
over the course of the day. We call it The Cooler, and we suggest sprinkling it liberally over your daily
conversation.
1. “I, for one, wouldn’t mind spending the summer in Bowie’s Caribbean villa.”
2. “When the hell does James Franco have time to paint hummingbird portraits?”
3. “Frankly, I don’t care how big the bottle is. $1,000 is too much to pay for ranch dressing.”
4. “And that’s what happens when you only eat Instagram blogger food for a week.”
5. “I wouldn’t set foot inside that geodesic dome full of foot-wide glass animal eyes.”
6. “That Porsche 928 is a thing of beauty.”
7. “Their wild python hunt wasn’t particularly fruitful.”
8. “The Portlandia actor just taught me how to drum. Or look like I know how to drum. Same difference.”
9. “Come to think of it, Ben Stiller is pretty much always in a tracksuit.”
10. “‘Why am I topless and soaked in champagne right now?’ is a perfectly legitimate question.”
1. “I, for one, wouldn’t mind spending the summer in Bowie’s Caribbean villa.”
2. “When the hell does James Franco have time to paint hummingbird portraits?”
3. “Frankly, I don’t care how big the bottle is. $1,000 is too much to pay for ranch dressing.”
4. “And that’s what happens when you only eat Instagram blogger food for a week.”
5. “I wouldn’t set foot inside that geodesic dome full of foot-wide glass animal eyes.”
6. “That Porsche 928 is a thing of beauty.”
7. “Their wild python hunt wasn’t particularly fruitful.”
8. “The Portlandia actor just taught me how to drum. Or look like I know how to drum. Same difference.”
9. “Come to think of it, Ben Stiller is pretty much always in a tracksuit.”
10. “‘Why am I topless and soaked in champagne right now?’ is a perfectly legitimate question.”
