These kids and their damn sexy Halloween costumes today. So, so dumb.

Sexy nurse: boring, trite, degrading to Miss America contestants.

Sexy pizza rat: it’s funny, but c’mon, you don’t really think it’s sexy. Not the rat part, at least.

Sexy Donald Trump: we haven’t seen it yet—but only because we’re worried about our Google search history.

Anyway, too many “sexy” Halloween costumes, not enough real sex appeal. It’s not like the old days in Hollywood. A starlet would perch herself upon a giant pumpkin in a Paramount back lot, show a little leg, maybe put on a witch hat and then let magic happen.

This slideshow brings it all back. Look at all those pumpkins and witch hats. Oh, yeah. And legs.