Calm down, everybody. Just calm down.
Yes, the rumors are true. Shake Shack opens its first Chicago location in River North tomorrow. (See the slideshow here.)
But come on. These burgers aren’t walking a tightrope or anything. They’re simply... burgers. Very good burgers. Fine, maybe you’ve orchestrated nonessential face-to-face client meetings in New York or Dubai just because you wanted to smell one. But let’s play this cool anyway.
Act nonchalant when you enter. Casually look around. Nod appreciatively at their moving puzzle murals of Chicago landmarks. Make a comment about how a few slabs of repurposed wood really brought out the highlights of this former Harley-Davidson store as you approach the counter.
Then, when the time is right, order your SmokeShack with bacon and cherry peppers. Maybe a Shack-cago Dog, which is the griddled and potato-bunned version of our hometown favorite. Maybe only the former, because...
Oh, yes, there will be shakes and concretes. They’ve enlisted Vosges’s chocolate for the Shack Attack, Glazed & Infused’s salted caramel donut for the Salted Carame’L’ and Bang Bang Pie Shop’s s’mores pie for their Da S’mores.
The energy drink of the 1985 Bears.