Today, we introduce The Whisky Sisters.

No, that’s not their birth name.

They just like whiskey. A lot.

And they’re willing to do whatever it takes to help you like whiskey, too (shouldn’t be hard).

Now, don’t go getting any crazy ideas... because, well, we’ve already taken care of that for you.

Below, a sampling of some of the unique services these scotch-loving siblings are willing to provide.

A “What Whiskey Do I Drink” Hotline
Say you’re at home. And you’re making dinner. And you need to know what kind of single malt suits beef bourguignon/reheated pizza. Call the girls. Tell them which scotches you’ve got lying around. They’ll tell you which to pour. Don’t stop till they say “when.”

A Scotch-Tasting Tailgate
Here’s what you need to do. Get tickets for the Dolphins home opener. Pick up a bunch of wings and steaks. Then, let the sisters know where you’ll be parked. They’ll: come to your tailgate armed with some rare whiskey tasting flights. You’ll: leave your beer in the cooler.

Getting in Touch with Your Inner Whiskey
Make an appointment to meet the ladies at their office. There’ll be a couch. Lie down. You’ll be asked questions. About your past. Your fears. Your favorite cocktails. And when the 30-minute session is finished, you’ll be connected with your soul dram. Also, you’ll know if you have any deep-seated father issues.