Entertainment

Ice Storm

Competitive Social Networking

4936966a7eb3663ca726999baa27e53bAs a noted American philosopher—okay, it was Pat Benatar—once theorized: love is a battlefield.

You: in total agreement.

And now, there’s a new opportunity for glory.

Welcome to The Ice Break, a social network for couples that lets you see how your relationship stacks up to the rest of the world’s, online now.

Officially speaking, the site isn’t about making relationships into a competitive sport. (Officially speaking.) Instead, it’s geared toward learning more about your partner and tracking your overall happiness as a coupl- ...

... Sorry. We drifted off.

Anyway, you’ll sign up with whoever you’re currently sharing a life/evening/power lunch with, and answer some personal questions about your shared hopes and dreams. You know, the minor details.

Then, every week after, you’ll rate your relationship’s communication, happiness, sex life and a bunch of other stuff on a sliding scale from totally dissatisfied to totally satisfied. (It’s highly technical.) For comparison’s (read: bragging rights’) sake, this scale will be converted into those old staples of romance: stats with charts and graphs.

Finally, you’ll round up your other coupled friends, have some sort of majestic trophy commissioned—think Lord Stanley’s Cup meets the Nobel Prize... but better—and compare your weekly numbers. Then, at the end of week 17 (stick with the familiar), you’ll claim victory, and you two will celebrate appropriately.

Which is how you won in the first place.

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