Food & Drink

Weed Wine Is On Its Way

And We’re Already a Little Disappointed

By Hadley Tomicki ·

A wise sage once warned us that, “Smoking grass and drinking beer is like pissing into the wind."

Still, we’ve long envied the Northern California wine makers holding on to their secret stashes of weed-infused wine. Weed and wine, together? It sounds like a glorious good time of love in the afternoon with soft, fuzzy seventies lighting on a picnic blanket in a meadow by a gently moving stream in bottle-form.

Fortunately, the ganja plant’s rapidly approaching legalization in the golden state is finally helping to usher in plans for a cannabis wine to hit dispensaries and the web in the coming weeks.

It comes from Sonoma winery Rebel Coast, which is taking $59.99 pre-orders for this THC-infused Sauvignon Blanc that will be shipped in early 2018. Plans for a rosé to follow in the second half of the year.

Their slogan here is “smells like weed, tastes like wine.” But really,  it’s tempting to say this elixir is not really wine, considering the self-described “disruptors” behind it have removed every trace of alcohol from the product. Last we checked wine is grape juice without the alcohol. So yes, Rebel Coast’s THC wine will not get you drunk. Strike one.

Even more disappointing, it may not even get you high. Each serving of Rebel Coast contains a paltry four milligrams of THC, intended, like so many new cannabis products these days, for the weed world’s initiates. Citing a 10mg-per-serving limit on cannabis products, the wine keeps to just 16mg a bottle. The THC is promised to be fast-acting, hitting the drinker in 15 minutes.

Still a low-THC, non-alcoholic wine? While we might not rush to buy that, it sounds like it could still have a place at the dinner party table, at the least to help wash down the cannabis-laced crab rendang and Alaskan Thunder Fuck baked Alaska.

But now you know it exists and where to find it.

And it really is worth it to read the company’s page, which shows Drake-levels of comprehension about the effects of cannabis, with assurances that the low-THC wine won’t  have you “thinking your couch is a hippo with short legs or anything.”

If only it did... 

Hadley Tomicki

Hadley Tomicki lives in Los Angeles. He is probably going nowhere on the 10 Freeway this very second.

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