No matter your views, it’s kind of hard to know what to do with yourself today.
So, hey. We’ve got some ideas.
Thirty-six of them, to be exact.
1. Call your mom.
2. High-five a stranger.
3. Buy a round for everyone at the bar.
4. Tip your bartender 200%.
5. Adopt a puppy.
6. Finish your Halloween candy.
7. Donate to the Red Cross.
8. Write your congressperson.
9. Open a steel mill in Ohio.
10. Take a nap.
11. Listen to the “Ocean Sounds” playlist on Spotify.
12. Start a Tolstoy.
13. Thank someone who is doing something thankless.
14. Peruse international real estate sites for a ramshackle farmhouse in some idyllic countryside where you can while away the next four years working to restore it to its former glory.
15. Move to a state where pot’s now legal, if you’re not already there. Smoke a lot of it.
16. Fully read all terms and conditions.
17. Get a desk plant.
19. Get a coffee to stay.
20. Leave your phone at home.
21. Take up smoking because fuck it.
22. Send someone a gift basket.
23. Send yourself a gift basket.
24. Book a few hours in a local sensory deprivation tank.
25. Bury your head in a cat’s belly.
26. Maybe a dog’s belly.
27. Build a time machine.
28. Take a couple days off from social media.
29. Get a haircut.
30. See what’s up with Tiffany.
31. Go on a hot-air balloon ride. Forever.
32. Take a stroll in a park. You must stroll.
33. Hug an immigrant.
34. Eat some fries.
35. Use some fishing line to tie yourself to various harmless objects around the office, then spend the day pretending they’re all coming to life, like in Toy Story.