The Rejection List —

Things We Left Behind in 2008

There are a lot of gems out there, but there's also a huge mountain of things that fell just short of our exacting standards—in some cases, very very short. Here are a few items from the top of the bottom of the pile.

Bacon Floss

Your concern for dental hygiene and unquenchable desire for bacon usually work against each other, but the creators of Bacon Floss have managed to bring them together for a bit of cured nylon that should replace your morning breath with a pleasant bacon-y aroma. Obviously if you're prepping for a night on the town, you may want to consider an after-floss mint.

The Sweatshirt
Beer-Transporting Apparel

The Sweatshirt

Among other things, 2008 is likely to go down in history as the year that Americans rose up as one to demand more ways to carry their beer. Why bother finding a flat surface for your drink when you can just stitch an extra pocket onto your hoodie and keep it pressed against your belly all night? If only you had some kind of

411: Beer Bottle Holder Sweatshirt

The Beerdolier

In today's fast-paced economy, you can't afford to drink one beer at a time. You need six beers arrayed around your waist at all times, insulated with neoprene koozies and ready to respond instantly to the challenges of the global marketplace. Get ready for the most efficient bleary-eyed tailgate you've ever had.

$60K Ice Cream Sundae

This big-ticket banana split includes a trip to Kilimanjaro, a few dollars toward African charity and ice shavings from the glacier at the mountain's peak. But for that much, it should really include caviar, powdered gold, a six-handed massage or some combination of the three.

Bedtime Stories Sheets

Body-writing has been sexy since the days of the Kama Sutra, but this Finnish concept design is the first time your sheets have gotten in on the action. Stretch them over your bed and—after a night of vague discomfort—you'll wake up with the words "six pack" imprinted on your chest...which will either be a boast or a joke, depending on how much you're enjoying your Beerdolier.

Crystal-Encrusted Toaster

You haven't really lived until you've eaten from a jewel-encrusted stainless-steel-and-glass Swarovski Crystal toaster... although we're guessing it tastes about the same as from the $30 Home Depot model. Gilded pop tarts sold separately.

Elsewhere on the Daddy

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