UD: What’s the most overrated thing about being a billionaire?
MC: Not a damn thing.
UD: We assume you have a weekly poker game with Branson, Buffett and Gates.
MC: We call each other and bitch about things—price of gas, usual sh*t... No. Never have hung out with any of them. Although, back in the ’80s, I was at a trade show hanging with some women. I thought I was pretty cool until the girls decided they wanted to go hang out with the guy who owns Microsoft. He was getting trashed, dancing and buying everyone drinks. So Bill G. stole my girls...
UD: Ha. So what does a Mark Cuban date look like?
MC: My wife. [laughs] Usually dinner and a movie. I don’t try to go big-time.
UD: But if you were going big-time...
MC: Go on vacation, buy a house there just because we liked it. Like we did with the Cayman Islands.
UD: Right. The usual. How do you go from Entourage and buying houses in the Caymans to lobbying for a college football playoff system?
MC: I’m a college football fan, but I’m a bigger fan of changing industries and businesses that have survived by “doing it the way it’s always been done.” I don’t always win, but I usually do.
UD: A college football playoff in 2015. Would you take the over/under on that?
MC: Even money.
UD: Fair enough. So how does someone get Cuban as an investor?
MC: Send me an email and convince me in three paragraphs or less why you have a great business that is unique.
UD: If you were starting a restaurant/nightclub, what would it be?
MC: NakedPizza.biz, coming soon to you.
UD: Governor Cuban, Senator Cuban, President Cuban. Your thoughts?
MC: Could you imagine the first questions—“Mr. Cuban, have you ever...?” Me: “Whatever the question is, the answer is yes. I did. Probably a bunch of times. Next question.”
UD: Best thing an opposing fan has said to you?
MC: “Did you sleep with my mom in college?”
UD: So, did you?
MC: He didn’t have a picture to show me. So I didn’t know.
UD: Other than Caron, do you have a butler?
MC: Hell no. I hate formal sh*t. I make my own meals at home. Carry my own luggage. Whatever is faster and easier for me, that’s what I do. I hate having someone do things for me just because I can.
UD: Okay, we have to ask: 2011 NBA Champ?
MC: I don’t make predictions...