Or failing that, at least pouring your own beer.
So welcome to the all-new Houndstooth Saloon, a Southern Gothic version of a sports bar, opening tonight.
Yes, it's the same Houndstooth that you've relied on all these years to quench your Loretta Lynn cravings—so the DJs will still crank country Thursdays and Sundays. But now that it's located a block down the block, they've gone really Deep South.
Imagine that you have an old uncle tucked away down in Tuscaloosa—an eccentric rascal, big 'bama fan, throws one hell of a ball—and he's given you the run of his old mansion. Walk in, grab a seat in the front parlor bar under some antler chandeliers, and belt back some Wild Turkey.
When your cravings for pulled pork and Texas toast grilled cheese take hold, amble toward the plank-covered Trophy Room (apparently flat-screen TVs are being awarded somewhere). And if the University of Alabama's playing so much as a game of checkers, you'll find it playing here. Finish your evening back in the Library, where large booths are outfitted with their own TVs and built-in table taps, giving you a measure of control over your fill-ups.
Of course, you measure control by the pint.