This Face Mask Purifies The Air While Playing Your Favorite Albums

Looking Like Sub-Zero Is Merely a Bonus

By Hadley Tomicki ·

Okay, sure, your face mask has a two-stage purification system capable of filtering out dangerous urban pollutants, fumes, allergens, and bacteria.

But can it drop bass?

You'll only answer that frequently asked question in the affirmative going forward.

Now that you’ve discovered The Dyson Zone Air Purifying Headphones, a fairly bizarre but certainly desirable advance in the world of now-requisite face masks.

This unique invention comes from the mad scientists at Dyson. Who may have made your vacuum or hair dryer or hand air dryer, should you be the kind of remarkable individual with one of those. They’ve taken their 30 years of filtration know-how to make something specifically for your face. They shouldn’t have.

But they did. And now you can sign up to be one of the first earthlings to know when it comes out this year. Allowing you to wear a mask that gives you the benefits of purified air while simultaneously blocking out city noise. So you can breathe, make calls, and listen to your favorite murder podcast or Cannibal Corpse album or BTS song, or anything else you may be into among the broad musical spectrum we’ve just painted for you.

And yes. You might look a little bit like Sub Zero from Mortal Kombat while wearing this thing. But it doesn’t even touch your mouth as it channels pure air to your breathing holes, which instantly makes it better than 99% of all other face masks out there. Not to mention the built-in hi-fidelity audio bumping in your ears.

Plus, that vacuum does run well, right?

Hadley Tomicki

Hadley Tomicki lives in Los Angeles. He is probably going nowhere on the 10 Freeway this very second.

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