First, the bad news.

We are not going to be able to teach you how to drive classic Ferraris here.

It’s a timing thing really.

Now, some good news.

These guys would be more than happy to.

Enter Ferrari Classiche Academy, which is like driver’s ed. if you were given the keys to a vintage Ferrari and not whatever bucket you could afford at 15. It's now open in Modena, Italy.

This is a 2-day program that will teach you everything you need to know about older Ferraris, sort of like the kind driven by Magnum P.I. and both Coreys in License to Drive. That slightly boxier, red species that comes with mechanical gearboxes and zero onboard electronics. Back when cars were more car than computer.

On the first day, you’ll take a class on driver safety and vehicle engineering principles before hitting the company’s Fiorano test track to go over subjects like changing gears and driving technique with an instructor. The second day, you'll explore the history and design principals of the brand, including visits to the archives and artisan workshop. Before getting back to the track to perfect your skills.

The only caveat to the whole affair is that you must be a Ferrari owner. But if you're not, no stress. They can bring guests.

So your sterling reputation as a plus-1 just might come in handy.