As anyone who’s ever searched for an apartment with a not unlimited budget knows, finding the right place
can be a real pain in the ass. Nothing is ever as it appears online. Landlords can be finicky. And what the
hell is that little door tucked away in the corner of the bedroom for? (If horror movies have taught me
anything, it’s to never trust random little doors.)
So in the spirit of pure escapism, we decided to check out which celebrities’ homes are currently up for sale. Then, we ranked them from least to most desirable, based entirely on our subjective whim.
Here are our findings.
7. Vince Vaughn’s Hollywood Hills House
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Specs: 3 beds, 3 baths, 2,890 sq ft
Asking price: 2.7m
General aesthetic: Clean. Rustic. Pottery Barn-esque.
Highlights: Beamed ceilings; a spacious outdoor patio; the ease with which you and your significant other can role-play the Vince Vaughn-Jennifer Anniston rom-com, The Break-Up, by dividing the space in two. On second thought, this may not be such a great idea.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 4. When you think Vince Vaughn, you don’t necessarily think “unique taste in home design.”
6. Kendall Jenner’s Wilshire Boulevard Apartment
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Specs: 2 beds, 3 baths, 2,068 sq ft.
Asking price: $1.6m
General aesthetic: White walls, white furnishings and hardwood floors, all the better to filter through Instagram.
Highlights: A sculpture garden; wrap-around windows with views of the LA skyline; a pervasive aura of entitlement and ego.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: Assuming your audience is “girls in LA who want to party in a luxury high-rise,” 10. In all other instances: 7.
5. Chris Rock’s Three-Story Brooklyn Carriage House
Location: Brooklyn, NY
Specs: 3 beds, 3 baths
Asking Price: $3.5m
General Aesthetic: Farmhouse-chic. Otherwise known as “Brooklyn.”
Highlights: Exposed brick; a roof terrace; the beguiling ghosts of SNL parties past, circa 1990-91.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 8.
4. David Bowie’s Central Park-Facing Condo
Location: New York, NY
Specs: 3 beds, 3 baths, 1,877 sq ft.
Asking price: $6.5m
General aesthetic: Elegant, grand and not quite as Bowie-esque as you might expect.
Highlights: Bowie’s grand piano; windows overlooking Central Park; the fact that you can play Bowie’s grand piano while overlooking Central Park.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 9, because Bowie was of course known as a man of discerning, interesting tastes.
3. Matthew Perry’s Hollywood Hills Bachelor Pad
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Specs: 3 beds, 5 baths, 3,821 sq ft.
Asking price: $13.5m
General aesthetic: Strikingly and decidedly mid-century modern.
Highlights: Walls of glass opening onto an infinity pool overlooking the city; a truly magnificent master suite; a screening room for watching The Whole Nine Yards. Or Friends. Probably Friends.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 3. It might actually be kind of sad, given Perry’s lack of post-Friends success.
2. Eva Gabor’s, then Audrey Hepburn’s Holmby Hills Estate
Location: Los Angeles, CA.
Specs: 6 beds, 6 baths, 6,797 sq ft.
Asking price: $14m.
General aesthetic: Old Hollywood sophistication.
Highlights: Manicured lawns for extravagant parties; a giant pool; a decadent library; the chance to become a bona fide part of Hollywood history. More or less.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 9. It’s hard to overstate how much people romanticize Audrey Hepburn.
1. John Legend and Chrissy Teigen’s SoCal Oasis
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Specs: 3 beds, 3 baths, 2,200 sq ft
Asking price: $2.5m
General aesthetic: Mid-century modern’s moment of zen.
Highlights: An outdoor basalt bathing area; mountain views; beamed cathedral ceilings; extremely positive juju.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 10, because is there a more lovable celebrity couple than John Legend and Chrissy Teigen?
So in the spirit of pure escapism, we decided to check out which celebrities’ homes are currently up for sale. Then, we ranked them from least to most desirable, based entirely on our subjective whim.
Here are our findings.
7. Vince Vaughn’s Hollywood Hills House
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Specs: 3 beds, 3 baths, 2,890 sq ft
Asking price: 2.7m
General aesthetic: Clean. Rustic. Pottery Barn-esque.
Highlights: Beamed ceilings; a spacious outdoor patio; the ease with which you and your significant other can role-play the Vince Vaughn-Jennifer Anniston rom-com, The Break-Up, by dividing the space in two. On second thought, this may not be such a great idea.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 4. When you think Vince Vaughn, you don’t necessarily think “unique taste in home design.”
6. Kendall Jenner’s Wilshire Boulevard Apartment
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Specs: 2 beds, 3 baths, 2,068 sq ft.
Asking price: $1.6m
General aesthetic: White walls, white furnishings and hardwood floors, all the better to filter through Instagram.
Highlights: A sculpture garden; wrap-around windows with views of the LA skyline; a pervasive aura of entitlement and ego.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: Assuming your audience is “girls in LA who want to party in a luxury high-rise,” 10. In all other instances: 7.
5. Chris Rock’s Three-Story Brooklyn Carriage House
Location: Brooklyn, NY
Specs: 3 beds, 3 baths
Asking Price: $3.5m
General Aesthetic: Farmhouse-chic. Otherwise known as “Brooklyn.”
Highlights: Exposed brick; a roof terrace; the beguiling ghosts of SNL parties past, circa 1990-91.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 8.
4. David Bowie’s Central Park-Facing Condo
Location: New York, NY
Specs: 3 beds, 3 baths, 1,877 sq ft.
Asking price: $6.5m
General aesthetic: Elegant, grand and not quite as Bowie-esque as you might expect.
Highlights: Bowie’s grand piano; windows overlooking Central Park; the fact that you can play Bowie’s grand piano while overlooking Central Park.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 9, because Bowie was of course known as a man of discerning, interesting tastes.
3. Matthew Perry’s Hollywood Hills Bachelor Pad
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Specs: 3 beds, 5 baths, 3,821 sq ft.
Asking price: $13.5m
General aesthetic: Strikingly and decidedly mid-century modern.
Highlights: Walls of glass opening onto an infinity pool overlooking the city; a truly magnificent master suite; a screening room for watching The Whole Nine Yards. Or Friends. Probably Friends.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 3. It might actually be kind of sad, given Perry’s lack of post-Friends success.
2. Eva Gabor’s, then Audrey Hepburn’s Holmby Hills Estate
Location: Los Angeles, CA.
Specs: 6 beds, 6 baths, 6,797 sq ft.
Asking price: $14m.
General aesthetic: Old Hollywood sophistication.
Highlights: Manicured lawns for extravagant parties; a giant pool; a decadent library; the chance to become a bona fide part of Hollywood history. More or less.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 9. It’s hard to overstate how much people romanticize Audrey Hepburn.
1. John Legend and Chrissy Teigen’s SoCal Oasis
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Specs: 3 beds, 3 baths, 2,200 sq ft
Asking price: $2.5m
General aesthetic: Mid-century modern’s moment of zen.
Highlights: An outdoor basalt bathing area; mountain views; beamed cathedral ceilings; extremely positive juju.
How cool it is to name-drop the former owner, on a scale of 1 to 10: 10, because is there a more lovable celebrity couple than John Legend and Chrissy Teigen?
