Which should in no way diminish your excitement.
For, lo, we bring tidings of Heatonist, which is a Williamsburg hot sauce tasting room with a hot sauce sommelier. It’s open now, and this is the slideshow.
Let’s address questions while you cancel all plans for the immediate future.
How many sauces?
They’ll have about 150, but it’s more about which sauces. No gums or additives or any of that garbage. It’s like the farmers’ market of hot sauce spots.
There’s a bar at the front with a gloved man behind it. Tell him what you’d like to try, he uses a big eyedropper, puts it on a tasting card, and voilà. You ask him, “Which one goes with lamb?” and he digs out a blueberry-chili number that goes with lamb.
Which ones should I try?
The hottest is Foo Foo Mama Choo, which has a base of Carolina Reaper (the world’s hottest chili). And they’ve got a chocolate-chili version that’s made especially for them by Canadians—those secret princes of the hot sauce universe.
But will there eventually be a kitchen for guest-chef dinners and a charming garden with a fire pit where I’ll be able to throw down a blanket on some grass and have a hot sauce picnic?
Damn, you’re good.