Mixed doubles. Freestyle haiku-ing. Dogsledding in the Arctic with Icelandic weather girls.
Or beard and mustache contests...
Behold: the Whiskey Waxing Beard & Mustache Competition, a mighty battle pitting beard against beard, going down tonight at Comstock Saloon.
There’s nothing like a little last-minute competition to get the adrenaline pumping. And with both your whiskey-sipping style nearly perfected and facial hair intact, it’s almost like you’ve been training for this moment all of your life.
First things first, you’ll want to email them before 7pm tonight to throw your hat in the ring. In that email, you’ll specify your category: beard (both freestyle and natural) or mustache (includes mustache and partial beard).
Basically, you’ll proceed (accompanied by the melodies of a barbershop quartet, of course) to the upstairs balcony. From there, you’ll face left, face right and then take a sip with all the panache you can muster—all under the watchful eyes of each of the three judges and the audience down below.
Speaking of the audience, you could also shave up and opt out of the competition, choosing instead to focus on the $5 cocktails on offer for the occasion.
Thus saving some gentlemen a whole bunch of embarrassment.