She wants you to call. Or maybe send flowers. Or, at the very least, clean up a bit.
Which means it might not be the best time to tell you about a shaving cream that smells like sake. But that's a risk we're willing to take...
Introducing Kyoku Sake Infused Shave Crème, a new balm that's pretty much exactly what it sounds like, available now.
Basically, it's a magical balm containing ancient Japanese face-healing secrets that take the sting out of shaving—not to mention it's a socially acceptable way to smell like sake before noon. This stuff is like regular shaving cream, but with the essential addition of sweet, sweet rice wine. The result is a cream with a silvery sheen, one that feels buttery to the touch. (That all said, we're pretty sure you shouldn't drink this stuff.)
Allegedly, the sake helps soften and moisten your skin, and has been used for exactly this purpose in Japan since ancient times—the method was discovered when Kyoku's founder, on a worldwide quest for good stuff (and presumably, for true happiness), came across some ancient villagers using it outside Tokyo.
And thus, the secret of the samurai's soft, buttery skin was revealed.