Rumor has it there's some kind of frozen hellscape blowing in from the east.
But you're having a little trouble hearing them.
The waves crashing upon your private beach can be so distracting sometimes.
You're coming here because A) it's literally freezing outside or B) because being on a secluded, sunny beach with a date is always better than not being on a secluded, sunny beach with a date. Sometimes it's that simple.
Upon entering your villa, you'll need to make a difficult decision: Do you start with an al fresco shower in the courtyard or ride down your water slide? Mull it over during a game of billiards in your open-air living room or whilst getting a hot stone massage on the terrace. You do your best decision-making under the influence of hot stone.
When you part with the attractions of your villa, there'll be a feast awaiting you on the beach. A team of chefs are creating a personalized menu of local hits, think fried fish with green plantains, while a beach butler brings you two a lengthy parade of rum drinks.
And there may come an afternoon when you want to step out of this palm-covered paradise. In which case, you'll simply arrange a little kite-boarding. Or go check out the local humpback whales.
Since you guys are pretty tired of the ones you have back home.