Food & Drink

You Design Your Own Hot Sauces Now

Using Rose Petals, Pumpkin Spice and Aleppo Peppers. Or Not.

By Hadley Tomicki ·
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No matter the issues of our day, this has to be something the world can fully unite behind: Customizable hot sauce.

It becomes available on August 14 from a Canadian company called Custom Heats. And it will finally allow you to get just a little more essence of root beer and notes of chai masala inside your liquid heat.

All the action takes place on the DIY Sauce page of the site, a veritable mixing board of exotic and piquant seasonings. Sort of like assigning skills to a video game protagonist, you’ll add different percentages of your chosen spices until you reach a full 100%.

You begin with a base of either red pepper, green pepper, mustard or smoked. This is followed by broad categories of regions, with Thai, North African, Caribbean, Middle Eastern and U.S. among the many options. Click one of these and different spice options are revealed. From these, you’ll choose percentages of each flavor, determining how much of each you want in your sauce.

So let’s say your hot sauces are bedeviled by a lack of German spices, whatever those are. You could make your hot sauce 40% cumin, 20% caraway, 30% pickling spices and then in a radical turn, hit the French tab and add 10% lavender to finish it off.

You could do 20% Kashmiri merch, 30% piri piri, 40% cubeb berries and 10% urfa biber, just to have a sauce you can’t even begin to explain to curious dinner guests. Or you could just go all in on apple pie and pumpkin spice, even if we swear we’ll never talk to you again. It’s your call.

So regardless of whether or not you should do these things, now you can. The combinations are just about infinite.

Though, like all things customizable, not everyone probably posesses the prudence and vision to create a coherent, dynamic hot sauce. But if you've always had the gnawing feeling that your destiny as a hot sauce designer, has passed you by, your day has finally come. Look out, Sriracha.

Hadley Tomicki lives in Los Angeles. He is probably going nowhere on the 10 Freeway this very second.

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