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Overanalyzing Alexis Ren's Instagram

Drawing Wildly Irresponsible Conclusions About the Insta-girl, Via Her 'Gram

By Geoff Rynex ·
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Sometimes, in an attempt to sneak a peek into the interior lives of the rich and famous, we’re forced to launch an investigation into the evidence at the public’s disposal. By which we mean, grossly overanalyze whom these people choose to follow on Instagram.

Today, we take a look into the deep follows of one Alexis Ren, the 20-year-old general influencer, this month's Maxim cover girl, and human embodiment of the Southern California sun. Let's see what Freud, Jung and Rogers have to say about the lass. Just kidding, let's dive headlong down the rabbit hole and bullshit this thing...


my spanish baddie

A post shared by ALEXIS REN (@alexisren) on Jul 17, 2017 at 8:44am PDT

The Profile
Alexis is the one on the right, but, well, you can see why it'd be psychologically important for us to use this photo as a representative of her feed. 
Posts: 403
Followers: 10.1 million 
Following: 270
Credo: "Public Figure"

The Bell Curve
The primary archetype of the Ren follower is a 26-30-year-old male who may have had her suggested to them by Instagram's algorithm after following a Miranda Kerr or another more traditional, less Instagram-made model. This person most likely makes multiple visits per day to Brobible and may have a Chive t-shirt in a drawer at home somewhere. Another follower archetype for Ren is the 15-22-year-old female fitspo follower set. To Ren's credit, she's mostly avoided flooding her feed with #ad posts, and has a lower post frequency than many of her peers. 

Outliers
@acearooney
This account has zero posts but is a "managed" account for an eight-year-old kid who, according to the profile, loves video games. The managers appear to be Alexis's sister and a couple friends. It's unclear if this is a brother, half-brother or random eight-year-old. Assuming she knows the kid, this indicates that even with her tight list of followees, it's not all about the personal brand.

@lernered

Happy Canada Day!

A post shared by Fred Lerner (@lernered) on Jul 1, 2016 at 11:40am PDT

A fellow named Fred Lerner whose feed consists almost entirely of bad, phone-shot landscapes and shots of outer space. Fred recently took a trip to the Body World's exhibit and is arguably the most out-of-place character on Ren's folowee list. Ren moved out of her parents house at 15, which makes "family friend" an unlikely, but not impossible, connection. She may have planted Fred as a red herring. 
UPDATE: Alexis has clarified for us via Twitter that Fred is her godfather, thus making this article a piece of service journalism. You're welcome. 

@drjasondiamond and @torie_d_lee

Honored & Humbled #AestheticEverything

A post shared by Dr. Jason Diamond MD (@drjasondiamond) on Jul 26, 2017 at 11:04am PDT

Respectively, "a world-renowned facial plastic surgeon from Dr. 90210 and Netflix's Celebrity Plastic Surgeons," and someone involved with "LPG, the ultimate advancement in body contouring, skin conditioning, and detox program," which also provides "a post-operative program to accelerate healing." Ren boldly claims she doesn't "edit" her body, referring to accusations she Photoshop's her Insta photos. We'll take her word on that. It's possible there's some pre-production going on however. Or maybe she just wants to be a cosmetic surgeon once the model dollars run dry. 

@spacex

Falcon 9 lifts Inmarsat-5 Flight 4 into orbit.

A post shared by SpaceX (@spacex) on May 17, 2017 at 11:02am PDT

Ren is clearly as psyched as we are about the possibility of private space flight and probably even more psyched because it could mean she can get a million miles away from the nearest leering 42-year-old father of four. 

Diagnosis
Ren keeps tight discipline on who she follows and shows an integrity that's rare on social media where plugging products is concerned. For someone who's been independent since they were 15, she's pretty transparent in her knowledge that she's selling sex and that her brand is a business. In sum, even if you looked like she does, you probably wouldn't be what she is. 

Geoff Rynex is the only person named Geoff Rynex in the history of mankind. He would rather have the best burger than the best steak, likes hearing bartender stories and spends too much money on clothes.

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