Skeptical Investigation

It’s a Butler You Text

None We’re lovers. You know that. But every now and again, something comes across our desks that requires extra scrutiny. And so we scrutinize, extra, for you.

We call it: Skeptical Investigation. (Trademark pending.)

GoButler, which just launched here, will get you anything your heart desires—they’ll make reservations and travel plans, make appointments and generally just do anything that’s not illegal, if only you’d text them to do so.

Our crack team of investigators signed up via email and were promptly put on a wait list. Not great.

But within a couple hours, they received a code and a number. They texted the code to the number and were greeted by Lisa. They requested from Lisa a tough-to-find bottle of whiskey and some furry handcuffs (why, what do you want?). She got their address and gave them a quote, item cost and tip included. They settled on a next-morning delivery and went to sleep, with visions of comfortable restraints dancing in their heads.

These guys have only been operational here for a few days, and, well, it shows. Many text messages were sent. Not all were answered. After some typical delivery-guy confusion, our investigators got the whiskey. They’re still waiting on the handcuffs.

We’d hate to see you wait on handcuffs.

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