Creepy Baby Masks
File this under “Things that can’t be unseen”: an ultra-realistic oversize baby mask that’s made out of high-grade latex and... apparently the tangible manifestation of all your nightmares.
The Rejection List
The Things We Left Behind in 2013
All year long, people contact us claiming to have discovered the next big thing. Sometimes they’re right. Sometimes they’re wrong. And sometimes they’re incredibly wrong. This is what it looks like when they’re incredibly wrong.
Ladies of Manure 2013 Calendar
For centuries, scientists have contended that it’s physically impossible to screw up a pictorial calendar of beautiful women. But as it turns out, all it takes is an environmental nonprofit to feature them frolicking through enormous quantities of “fertilizer.” Miss September, what have they done to you...
Speakeasy Briefs
There are a lot of places you could conceivably hide a flask. And then there’s one place you absolutely should not. Yep: here’s a pair of briefs with a built-in crotch pouch designed for concealing hooch. “Is that a mini flask in your pocket”...
Zip Tie
This is either the world’s most offensive tie or the world’s most useless zipper. Either way, pretty sure we can all agree that zipper ties are extremely unfortunate.
Rent a Mourner
There’s nothing funny about death. However, there might be something just a tiny bit funny about a bunch of enterprising Englishmen who started a service that rents out fake mourners for funerals. If you need us, we’ll be in hell.
