Upping the Anti

Introducing Your Anti-Resolutions

You’ve already got your 2013 resolutions all lined up. They’re impressive. We’re especially looking forward to your yeti romance novel. But until that ball drops, you’ve got eight days to do pretty much the opposite of all of them. Here are your 2012 anti-resolutions...

UD - A Swingers Party with Standards

A Swingers Party with Standards

Your resolution: To be a paragon of fidelity.
But first: You’ll don an Eyes Wide Shut–esque mask for this roving, porn-star-attended swingers club. Think more anonymous celebrities exploring their sexuality and less old dudes and a bowl of keys. Okay, ease up on the thinking now.

UD - A Spiked Energy Cocktail

A Spiked Energy Cocktail

Your resolution: To switch to decaf.
But first: Belly up to a housemade energy drink dreamed up by Eamon Rockey (fresh off his time at Atera). It’s a mixture of ginseng, ginkgo biloba, grapefruit zest, sparkling cider... Oh, and booze. For energy.

UD - Celebrating New Year’s by Gambling

Celebrating New Year’s by Gambling

Your resolution: To cut down on wagering and games of chance.
But first: Extend that heater as long as possible in the city’s only casino. Because every hour, you’ll have a chance to win a trip to wherever in the world it has just struck midnight. Pro tip: 9pm is Brazil.

UD - A Ludicrously Extravagant Hotel Suite

A Ludicrously Extravagant Hotel Suite

Your resolution: To curb unnecessary spending.
But first: Maybe just one night in this 1,700-square-foot hotel suite designed by Bentley. It’s got stitched-leather walls and, well, it looks like a Bentley. You’ll also have the keys to North America’s first Bentley Mulsanne. Just bring it back with a full tank.

$9,500/night and up, available at St. Regis New York, 2 E 55th St (at 5th), 212-753-4500

UD - The Twinkie Bagel. Of Course.

The Twinkie Bagel. Of Course.

Your resolution: To drop a few pounds.
But first: This Brooklyn-based sponge-cake bagel will enter your breakfast universe. It’s topped with a fluffy vanilla cream cheese. Let that sink in... just a little longer... Yes, it’s a Twinkie bagel. Let us never speak of this again.

$2.85, available at The Bagel Store, 349 Bedford Ave, Brooklyn, 718-218-7220; 754 Metropolitan Ave, Brooklyn, 718-782-5856

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