Or anyway, you do when face-offs against Russia are concerned.
So today, we bring good news: America has again beaten the Russkies at their own game.
And this time, it’s the caviar game...
Welcome to the brave new world of Paramount Vodka Caviar, fish eggs infused with vodka (as you may have deduced), available now for your boozy blinis.
If you’re tired of taking all that time switching back and forth between your roe and your highball, this is the solution. It’s the royal union of whitefish and fruits (or chili peppers, if you prefer) with flavored vodka, courtesy of some entrepreneurial farmers on Long Island Sound. (No word on if Al Michaels provided the play-by-play.)
Let us paint a picture. It’s late summer—camping season—and you realize that the three-mile hike to your secluded beach spot would be a whole lot easier without those weighty vodka bottles taking up pack space. And because you’re not about to go camping without a few jars of caviar—you’re not a savage, after all—you slip one of these in your bag instead. As for the taste, well... it’s got vodka in it.
Hey, you can’t have everything.