Exit Sandman

The World’s First Sand-Free Beach Towel

UD - Sandless Beach Mat Let’s talk sand.

In the plus column: perfect for Maverick-worthy volleyball tournaments and Gehry-worthy castles.

In the minus column: has a habit of finding its way into... places where you don’t want sand.

Your secret weapon: the Sandless Beach Mat, a particle-repelling mat designed to help you get back to living a sand-free existence, available now.

Now, we know. It’s a tarp. But it’s an extremely high-tech tarp, developed by the military to keep helicopters and tanks from getting dusty on operations in the desert. And now, it’s doing something even more vital to our national interests: keeping your beach visits blessedly sandless.

It basically functions like a beach towel. Make that exactly like a beach towel. You sit on it, rather than on the sand. (You can do it.)

But here’s where the high-tech stuff comes in: if a little sand happens to splash on it, the sand will fall right through it—thanks to a sophisticated sort of polyurethane on the mat. (This is your Defense Department dollars at work.) All of which means the sand stays on the beach, rather than finding its way into the crannies of your shoes, your cell phone or your antique Louis XIV beach umbrella.

You go to a very upscale beach.

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