1. Finally, a foodstuff worthy of a friendly 4am mezcal-induced wager.
2. Wow, that’s super stupid.
3. “I was thinking more along the lines of a bag of Funyuns, but now that you mention it...”
Either way, it’s Friday.
So we figured you could use some baked tarantula in your life.
Right: Edible Oven-Baked Tarantulas, the next big thing in mail-order arthropod technology, now available online.
No, we’re not kidding. And, in fact, they’re considered quite the delicacy over in Cambodia (although we’re not sure exactly where that bar has been set), which also happens to be where these things were originally sourced. So after you’ve mustered up the courage—or lost the aforementioned bet—you’ll jump online and place your order.
Soon enough, your eight-legged canapé will arrive at your door, pre-baked, ready to eat and carefully packaged in a petri dish (sounds about right). And in case you prefer your tarantulas gently warmed before consumption (you’re not a barbarian), each one comes conveniently equipped with detailed cooking instructions.
Oh, and before we forget—and this is actually kind of important—you’ll need to go ahead and remove the fangs before you eat it.