It’s just that between the long practice hours, winter games in Green Bay and strict league policy regarding players and cheerleaders, you’d prefer to take your audible skills elsewhere.
Still, that doesn’t mean your mastery of the West Coast Offense need go to waste.
Introducing Thump, a new app that lets you turn every play of every nationally televised football game into a gamble, available now.
Basically, this is your chance for instant-gratification sports gambling (those high-stakes rock-paper-scissors games notwithstanding). Before each play, you’ll attempt to guess exactly what the offense is going to do next. The more specific you can be, the more points you stand to earn. And when arbitrary virtual points are at stake, you’ll generally stop at nothing to win.
But in the event you want to make things a little more interesting, you’ll join up with a group of friends, and all face off head to head. You’ll decide on the terms (something involving gold bullion), agree on payment conditions (as always, unmarked briefcase) and feel that familiar rush as a formerly meaningless second quarter fake punt turns into something akin to a no-limit backroom Pai Gow table.
And much like the real teams, if all else fails, you’ll always have the option to throw a Hail Mary. In this case, you’ll dial up a Double or Triple Dog bonus, a limited chance for extra points that could swing the game in your favor.
You know what to do with that cooler of Gatorade.