Gear

Elon Musk's Flamethrower Is a Real Flamethrower

The Boring Company’s Latest Innovation Is Remarkably Practical and Selling Fast

By Thompson Brandes ·
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Elon Musk is taking on the difficult mission of saving profound amounts of energy, improving societal commutes and landing people on Mars. But first, he’d very much like for 20,000 Americans to start totally roasting shit with a new flamethrower released for pre-order this weekend by Musk’s The Boring Company.

The flamethrowers are currently going for $500 a pop, and over 8,000 of them have been pushed out as of this morning. Musk is shooting to sell all 20,000 of his initial batch, and it’s safe to say he’ll knock that number out just in time for Tesla Branch Manager Todd’s exit survey:

Musk is all about efficiency, after all. But should you need a more practical approach for your new flamethrower, here are a few parting ideas:

  • Nailing that perfect sugary brown on your caramelized onions.
  • Putting the finishing touches on a nice lemon chicken roast.
  • Lighting up a foursome of celebratory cigars on the back-nine.
  • Getting that tough winter frost off your car in the morning before work (imagine the look on your neighbor’s dumb, shoveling face).
  • S’mores.
  • Finally putting an end to that pesky rodent problem.
  • DIY wart removals.
  • Sparking up your morning incense.
  • Impressing a first date.
  • Performing your new hit single at the BRIT Awards.
  • Hank Scorpio impressions

Thompson Brandes is getting sucked into another Jurassic Park movie on AMC right now.

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