Crowd Control

Adoring Crowds. On Demand. Seriously.

None Quick, what do these three things have in common:

1. A presidential victory speech.
2. A three-pointer at a Lakers game.
3. You walking down the street.

That’s correct:

Massive. Roaring. Crowds.

That’s assuming you’re either incredibly popular with strangers... or you’ve enlisted the services of Crowds on Demand, a completely rational new LA-based service that lets you enlist a few hundred people to cheer you on as you go about your day, available now.

First, yes. This is real. Second, well... it’s hard to know where to go from there. But if you suspect you could use this thing to hire a bunch of fake paparazzi and fake screaming fans to chase you down Melrose like your last name was Pattinson, you’re not wrong.

That’s not all they do, though. Say you’ve just had a long flight coming back from NYC, and the twins you met last week at Sixty-Six suddenly can’t pick you up at the airport. (They’re washing each other’s hair.) But a few dozen ecstatic “fans” with signs, “reporters” with probing questions about your trip, and a limo? Sure. Not a problem. You’re feeling better already.

They’ll also organize a fleet to come to your office to congratulate you for replacing the water cooler. They’ll stage street rallies in your honor. They’ll do phone banking on your behalf. They’ll...

Well, it’s you who’s being charitable, really.

All these actors need something to do.

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