Let that sink in for a minute.
Right about now, you’re saying to yourself: “Dammit. It’s pool season and I haven’t even downloaded one iPhone app that takes me on virtual fitness quests where I can compete against my friends to see who can look the most dashing under the sun.”
We hear you... we hear you.
Which is why it’s our pleasure to introduce Fitocracy, a new app that turns your workout routine into a game and lets others heckle you if you fail to become anything other than a bronzed poolside statuette, available now.
Think of this as Mario Kart for getting jacked (we said it... jacked). And the only objective is to rack up points that you earn by performing and logging every last Bulgarian split-squat and hammer-grip-incline-dumbbell-press you do. Or, you know, every mile you jog.
The kicker: you’re playing against real people who would like nothing more than to have more abs than you. You’ll download the app, answer a few questions—age, weight, what kind of workout you normally do—and you’re set.
From there, you’ll be able to sift through a library of hundreds of exercises and go on “quests” (why yes, one of them is called the Baby Widowmaker) to level up as much as possible and pit your progress against your friends.
So yeah, don’t be friends with anyone bigger than you.