Sure, an umbrella will help you with the downpour, but if it's pouring and you're forced to defend your (or her) honor, you shouldn't be bogged down with both an umbrella and a weapon. You're a gentleman, not an officer.
Introducing The Unbreakable Umbrella, an indestructible tool that protects you from rain, wind, snow and any knife-wielding assailants you may happen to encounter.
Courtesy of Real Self-Defense, the umbrella should last through any number of rough encounters without getting bent out of shape. And, though it weighs in under two pounds, it packs the same wallop as a baseball bat, so you'll be equipped for more than just unexpected weather.
Reinforced with ABS composite plastic, the umbrella is strong enough to withstand anything you might throw at it, including yourself—feel free to jump on it, hang from it or get into any other Bond-style shenanigans you may have in mind. And, best of all, it's inconspicuous, which explains why it's become the preferred raingear of the Philippine Secret Service. The RSD folks were good enough to supply video of a bodyguard letting loose on a watermelon here, so you'll see what the umbrella can do.
After all, the greenmarket gets pretty rough these days.