Allow us to introduce your fallback option...
Welcome to AutoGyro USA, a dealership selling low-speed, two-person choppers, available now for your aviating needs.
Now, we know: there is absolutely nothing wrong with the military-grade helicopter currently residing in your garage/storage building/mountaintop lair. Still, you can never have too much backup.
This thing looks like something the Pentagon and Morgan Freeman’s character in Batman would come up with, except it tops out at 100 mph—more of a Sunday drive kind of chopper. There’s a top rotor, which lets you hover in the air like a classic heli. But the back rotor is similar to an airplane’s, pushing you forward like a jet engine and letting you steer it like a plane. (Trust us—it’s easier.)
Naturally, you’ll want to try before you buy—after all, these things go for upwards of 75 grand. (You may also somehow lack a pilot’s license.) But here’s where this dealership comes in: they’re based in Maryland, but they’ll also connect you to a flight school in Costa Rica, where you can take an autogyro for a test drive. After a week of training runs through the jungle, down the coastline and over the mouth of a volcano, you’ll be fully certified.
Or you could just consider it a vacation.