1. Escort them to the aptly named World of Beer after they open on Monday in Midtown.
2. Immediately head for the granite bar facing the beer cooler that’s stocked with 500 different ones of those. (Here’s the menu and here’s the slideshow.)
3. Point out how the shelves have different labels on them like “Scotland/Ireland,” “Drink Like a Local” and “Trappist.”
4. Explain how there are also 53 taps: 50 regular, one that’s for hand-pumped cask beers and two for the infusion keg that instantly flavors beer with things like rum-soaked oak chips, coffee and dried hops.
5. Play the “I spy with my little eye: a big patio and a random painting of an astronaut holding a beer” game.
6. Regret playing that game.
7. Order some Black & Tan Onion Rings and beer-battered fried shrimp tossed in sriracha lime aioli.
8. Ask them if they’d like a beer now.
Your work here is done.