Opening Statement
An Undiscerning LES Bar with a Secret Dance Hall

Let’s go back. Way back. All the way to Sunday.

It’s 3:46am. You’re still wearing your tuxedo. But someone else’s shoes, top hat and bow tie.

It’s at this point when you swear off extravagant indulgence for 2012.

So we probably shouldn’t be telling you about an out-of-control dance party inside a lounge made of beer cases...

Welcome to Open House, a shadowy party spot on the Lower East Side that’s home to multiple bars, multiple DJ booths and one soundproof panic room, discreetly open now.

From the outside, it looks absolutely nothing like a bar. Don’t let that faze you. You’ve seen that move before. Just search for a little framed window with a littler neon sign that reads “Open House.” If it’s illuminated, they’re serving. Go ahead and enter.

The most important thing you’ll find here: a pair of dueling dark wood bars. No small plates. No complicated cocktails. Nothing to get in the way of you, a quickly poured whiskey and the dance floor.

The second most important thing you’ll find here: a set of stairs between those dueling dark wood bars.
 
Take them down, turn left and you’ll run into a barricade of flattened 30-pack cases. Nice job. You’ve just found the hidden entrance to a soundproof antechamber that doubles as an unhinged late-night party room.

And triples as a Mayan apocalypse fallout shelter.