Well, we’ve just received some really unfortunate news for the Swiss Army.

Their crazy knives, the ones with the little toothpicks and sh*t hidden inside, are no longer the strangest blades on the planet.

That honor... goes to these knives. Knives that fell from outer space.

Behold Bubba Knives, a Georgia-residing man (and his website) you’ll use for tracking down and commissioning some really bizarre sharp things, online now.

Made-to-order opulent blades. That’s what you’re linking up with this guy for. A Damascus that doubles as a straight razor. An oyster knife with a mother-of-pearl handle. A gigantic machete that you can hold while walking around saying things like “That’s not a knife. That’s a knife.”

See, chances are, if it’s sharp and pointy, this guy can find it for you. Or this guy can make it for you. And if you’re going the custom-blade route, ask to see what he has in meteorite. (Yup, he’s got a hookup on some space rock that he’ll occasionally use to make handles.)

No, they don’t float.