Have you heard the good news? Maison Margiela has a new shirt currently taking the sartorial internet by storm, perhaps because it is not a shirt, but rather a ginger piece of terry cloth that someday hopes to be one—or used to be one. Either way, the experimental Skeleton Shell is currently going for $1095. And while a cool stack may be peanuts to those entrenched in the (mostly) invisible button-up game, it’s a lot to ask from the everyday wearer of clothes.

All judgements aside, this shirt does, in fact, exist. It will be worn somewhere by someone and that someone could be you. So let’s run through a list of times wherein it would seem kosher—maybe even necessary—to don such an expensive garment garnish.

Hot Dog Eating Contests

Good luck spilling mustard on this one my guy. Simply tuck a napkin up into the collar and you’re ready to indulge.

Saturdays With the Boys

There’s nothing worse than being the buzzkill who didn’t quite dress up enough to adhere to common dress code standards. Kill that vibe entirely by stuffing a Margiela Skeleton Shell into your back pocket in case of formal emergency.

The Gym

Tiny Tank Top Bro isn’t going to know what fucking hit him.

Casual Fridays

Take a lesson from the Casual Friday God, herself.

Third Dates

Sex? Yes please.

(On the flip side, this is not a very good shirt for your significant other to casually slip on come morning.)

Job Interviews

Take charge of the room and look your future employers in the eye. Odds are, they’ll be looking at you in the nipples.