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Herewith, Your 2015 Anti-Resolutions

Twenty-four hours. That seems like a sizable amount of time to focus on resolutions. So if you’re now done with all that, let’s move on to the complete opposite...

Anti-Resolution: A $260 Chocolate Bar
RESOLUTION: GIVE UP SWEETS

Anti-Resolution: A $260 Chocolate Bar

This isn’t an ordinary chocolate bar. It’s sourced from heirloom cacao varieties in coastal Ecuador, only 574 exist, and it arrives in a wooden box with a serial number and Spanish elm tasting tweezers so your finger oils don’t taint the chocolate. Everything we just said is true.

Anti-Resolution: Coffee All Over You
RESOLUTION: GIVE UP COFFEE

Anti-Resolution: Coffee All Over You

It’s not drinking coffee if you... let someone rub finely ground beans blended with clay, honey and sarsaparilla all over your body. It’s allegedly a good thing for your skin, plus you smell like coffee.

Anti-Resolution: A 6L Bottle of Krug
RESOLUTION: DRINK LESS

Anti-Resolution: A 6L Bottle of Krug

Yeah, that’s an imperial. Which is the equivalent of eight bottles. If you pick it up at the newly reopened winery, one of the oldest around, you’ll get a tasting and tour. Almost makes it reasonable. Sort of.

$440-$720, available at Charles Krug Winery, 2800 Main St (near Deer Park), St. Helena, 707-967-2200

Anti-Resolution: Batting at AT&T Park
RESOLUTION: HIT THE GYM

Anti-Resolution: Batting at AT&T Park

The gym is all crowded with newbies this time of year anyway. Kind of makes sense to get in a batting-practice session at AT&T Park. With a former Giants player. Oh, and a tour of the ballpark and some lunch would be nice, too. If they’re asking.

$50,000 and up, available through IfOnly, use code “VIPDADDY” for member access

Anti-Resolution: A Limited-Edition Cigar
RESOLUTION: GIVE UP SMOKING

Anti-Resolution: A Limited-Edition Cigar

Groucho Marx lived to 86. Maybe it was good genes. Or maybe it was good cigars... Wingtip’s cove has over 100 cigars in stock, plenty of which are sold out everywhere else, like Davidoff Year of the Sheep or Cohiba’s Comador. Time to normalize relations.

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