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Published September 28, 2012

There Will Be Blood
A Bunch of Killers in a Room

You haven’t spent much time thinking about brutal murders.

And that’s good. It’s perfectly normal and healthy and how it should be.

But, come on. Just this once...

Step carefully into Killers: A Nightmare Haunted House, a legitimately f***ed-up and fascinating labyrinth through the history of serial killers, officially kicking off Halloween season tonight.

Technically, yes, this is a haunted house. But one based on actual human beings and your admittedly macabre fascination with how they ticked. A haunted house of the mind... and unholy amounts of only-probably fake blood and guts.

When you arrive, you’ll be marked with an X on your forehead if you’re okay with being touched during the tour. And know: you will be touched. Start off with a drink in the lobby. Seriously, do this. There’s a full bar when you first arrive.

Now look around. Why yes, this is a converted school. And, oh, look, it’s a painting by John Wayne Gacy. And... hey, there’s Ted Bundy’s actual execution letter. The whole place is covered in actual serial killer artifacts.

Try to shake that off for a minute, then bottoms up and head in for the tour. We won’t spoil any surprises...

But don’t expect to want to take a bath anytime soon.
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