Published February 07, 2014
A Battle of Liquor Delivery Apps
We’re lovers. You know that. But every now and again, something comes across our
desks that just seems... suspicious. Because of the tremendous material upside to all our lives if these
claims pan out, we at times put ourselves in harm’s way to investigate. Albeit skeptically.
We call it: Skeptical Investigation. (Trademark pending.)
Two new local booze delivery apps, Drizly
(by way of Boston) and
(by way of... not Boston), will speedily furnish you with the liquid fun you desire, right
to your door. And you make this happen with your phone.
The thirsty proletarians of UD Labs fired up the apps, which work in
pretty obvious, app-like ways. After much discussion and some chart presentations, they settled on ordering
bourbon and pinot noir from each.
Next, the following directives were executed:
1. Synchronize watches.
2. Smash the “in case of booze emergency” glass on the lab’s control panel.
3. Simultaneously insert and turn red “order” keys (read: touch the “order” buttons on each
And the race was on.
The Drizly order arrived in a blazing 28 minutes, with 100% order
accuracy (just don’t attempt to use their tracking function). And despite an admittedly superior
selection, Minibar failed to meet their 60-minutes-or-less claim and sauntered in a full 73 minutes behind
Drizly for a total time of 101 minutes.
So... that wasn’t close.