We’ve seen the future. It’s a strange and fascinating place, filled with technological advances too dangerous or mind-blowing to go into production at the present time. Take this design—still on the drawing board, but too game-changing not to share. Please use this advance intel for good...

You’re pretty good at making toast. You’re also pretty good at printing documents.

And yet you never considered combining these two poles of your life: the kitchen and the office, the sensual and the verbal, fire-branded grain and the thrill of the written word...

The toaster and the printer.

Until now. 

Introducing The Toaster Printer, a printer-shaped toaster, planned for production as of... someday. (We hope.)

It’s the next great leap in toaster technology—whenever the rest of the world catches up. Instead of pushing your bread into two slots, you’ll stack it in a line on top of this magical device. Push the print/toast button and, one by one, the slices will drop in and slowly emerge as the toast you so crave. (Presumably, the jam/toner cartridge is still under development.)

There’s a second button to adjust the browning, but otherwise that’s it. So far, there’s only one in existence, but it’s been winning design prizes across Central Europe based on its heretofore unprecedented combination of print and toast technologies.

To be fair, the Swiss really love toast.