Leisure

All Is Calm

Your Holiday-Stress Survival Guide

You’re really in the thick of it now—last-minute familial “merriment,” something about the need to have purchased “gifts,” the general troubling state of holiday-related humanity at large. Sometimes a person just needs hot chocolate... rubbed all over their body. Here are the best ways to relieve holiday stress.

COCOA MOTION

Hot Chocolate Stone Massage

You Require: A thorough kneading of your gift-wrapping muscles in something hot and chocolaty.
You’ll Receive: A 50-minute hot chocolate oil and basalt stone massage at the Ritz-Carlton’s spa. With a chocolate truffle at the end. You bring the tiny marshmallows.

SWEAT DREAMS

Sweat Lodge

You Require: A head-to-toe thawing after perilous contact with the fake snowfall at the Grove.
You’ll Receive: 55 boiling minutes in a private, curtained-off nook at Shape House, watching Netflix on a flat-screen under an infrared blanket. Close call. Almost had some winter there.

UTTER NON-SENSE

A Sensory-Deprivation Tank

You Require: Two hours without hearing “Jingle Bell Rock.” Really. That’s all you ask.
You’ll Receive: Extreme isolation soaking in 1,000 pounds of Epsom salts in a pitch-black, soundproof sensory-deprivation tank. You know, a traditional Venice Christmas.

GOLD PLAY

A 24-Karat-Gold Facial

You Require: Well, you’re good on frankincense. Totally stocked up on myrrh. So, um, the other one.
You’ll Receive: Oh, just a quick, leisurely 24-karat-gold mask facial in Malibu. It’s the least dramatic thing Malibu can do to your face.

MADE IN THE JADE

A Personal Jade-Lined Sauna

You Require: Instead of neon garland, twinkling lights and plastic reindeer, you’d prefer just some nice, simple... metamorphic green rocks.
You’ll Receive: A session in your own private sauna pod, filled with jade stones and the piped-in scent of lavender, eucalyptus and sage. The soothing effect will last for days, or until you try to get on the 10.