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Published March 14, 2010

Rules of the Game
Getting Kidnapped in France

UD - Ultime RéalitéYou're no stranger to the seedier parts of the world.

From the red-light district of Kathmandu to the underground meatball dens of Stockholm, you've learned to never turn down an illicit thrill. But you usually draw the line at forcible abduction.

Usually.

Welcome to Ultime Réalité, a French firm specializing in mock-kidnapping, mock-drug-running and mock-just-about-any-criminal-pursuit-you-can-dream-up, taking ideas now.

It's basically The Game moved across the Atlantic and overdubbed in French. The first step is convincing an adventurous friend (or an unusually gullible enemy) to shake their life up by signing away their non-kidnapping rights and submitting to a battery of physical and mental tests, just to make sure they can handle the punishment.

After that, the Ultime crew will keep tabs on them until their guard drops—it could be as long as days—then shove them in the back of a van and whisk them away to their very own mini-prison, where they'll spend up to 10 hours shackled and in increasingly credible fear for their life. (In France, this is usually the beginning of a good time.)

If you want a souvenir, there'll be a gentleman lurking in the shadows with a camera to give you a video record of the whole thing. Don't worry, he'll only shoot your good side.

Naturally, details are sketchy—and really, they'll be down for any demented scheme you can dream up. But we've heard reports of previously law-abiding citizens running motorboats full of contraband down the Seine, pursued by an unmarked helicopter.

We're 99% sure it'll all be fine.
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