You’ve got a problem.
And once again it centers on a pouty Russian model.
She’s homesick. She misses Moscow winters. She vants to drink wodka and listen to ze deesco music
all night long.
Good thing you specialize in making pouty Russian models happy.
Which brings us to Tzar Ultra Lounge, a new fantasyland of chilled vodka
vaults, fur-lined ceilings and kaleidoscopic electric floors, now open for your
entertainment.
You’ll need the place the next time you’re brokering a deal with some Caspian power players who never
even begin talking business until they’ve polished off a few bottles of first-growth ’96 bordeaux, their
preferred pre-vodka appetizer.
So your night begins after you sink into your enormous booth, heavily fortified by velvet ropes. Your
hostess bestows you with your iPad to browse cocktails—and if you think the
Tzar Martini is just
the thing for the hot tub Memorial Day party you’re planning, email the recipe to yourself. (Also, the
hostess’s number.)
When your companions are ready to deal, they’ll want privacy. And 150 kinds of vodka. So you’ve arranged
some quality time in the vodka vault, a clear glass chamber cooled to 27 degrees, in full view of the room
(good thing you’ll be swaddled in faux fur coats). Toast your new partnerships from shot glasses made of
ice.
The Siberian version of a Jell-O shot.
VITALS
Tzar Ultra Lounge
215 W Ontario St
Chicago, IL 60654
312-255-8927
official website