Outside Chance
The City’s Only Outdoor Hotel Suite

This heat. This stultifying, stick-to-the-back-of-your-neck heat.

It can make you do crazy things.

So this is probably the exact perfect time to tell you about The Inside-Out Suite at the Affinia Chicago, a lavishly equipped, $10,000-a-night, 29th-floor alfresco encampment offering civilized respite from these, the muggiest days of summer, available Fridays and Saturdays.

You’re already familiar with a good portion of this 1,800-square-foot suite: it encompasses the C-View’s terrace, that breezy rooftop where you occasionally pop an Easy Breezy, your favorite summer gin cocktail. But you always thought it lacked something. Starting with a king-size bed... and ending with breakfast served in it.

So after dropping your bags with the bellman, you’ll be whisked to the top floor. Peel off that seersucker sport coat (nice choice, by the way) and head directly to the champagne, chilled and ready to cool you and your guests.

Dinner will be planned by C-House according to your whims, but you’ll pick the evening’s entertainment: movies projected on the exterior wall and watched from the safety of your bed. Should you require something like a tray of midnight oysters, just say the word.

Eventually, your lids will grow heavy under the twinkling of stars, the moon and the John Hancock’s flashing antennae. As you’re cooled by a languid lake breeze, you’ll be lulled to sleep by the murmur of the city below.

Fully de-stultified.