“Oh boy. Yeah, that’s pretty bad. I’m gonna need to get that worked on.”
—You at all times from now on because here’s an app that dispatches massage therapists to wherever you are in as soon as an hour

Here to validate the existence of technology: Soothe, an on-demand massage service and app that does exactly what we just said it does, now available for iPhone and Android.

The first thing you do is download the app. Then you put your credit card info in for massage fees and gratuities. Then you request a therapist to come to your current location, whether it’s your home, your office, a hotel, wherever.

And we mentioned that they can be there in as soon as an hour of your request, right? Because they can be there in as soon as an hour of your request. Moving on...

You can book up until midnight, which should prove particularly useful if you plan to spend the day running around Grant Park during Lollapalooza and need your muscles in shape for the next day.

Or if you just want a massage.